@% My Family Says....

My youngest daughter has lately been following me around with a sly smile on her face while texting madly as I go about my business.  It seems she finds it amusing to post everything I say to her twitter account called #@% my mom says.  Which is followed by my other kids phoning me minutes later to either bug me about it or ask for details.  So I am retaliating by posting my own #@% my family says:

Here is what my daughter texted during her first week in a far away city where she is going to University:

"It is really hard to deal with not having any of my stuff- no furniture, books or internet. 
Now I know how difficult it was for the pilgrims when they came to America to set up their apartments...."

Here is the email I just sent my husband tonight (he is away):

Babe -

Thank you so much for calling to remind me to do poop patrol.

It was almost dark so I used a flashlight, giving a beautiful glow to 

each little piece of shit (although also causing me to miss and get my hands dirty.

So nice of you to think of the little things, even when you are away!

And his response:

"Next time you should use one of the headlamps thus keeping both hands free to patrol more effectively"